That time when eating vegetables nearly killed me

It started out so innocently.  I re-watched Forks Over Knives and was of course inspired to eat a plant-based lunch of roasted fall vegetables (I have to make these life changes on a "one-meal-at-a-time" basis - you know how I roll).

I preheated the oven - which today was serving double duty as a space heater since we haven't turned on our heat yet - and was starting to chop my vegetables.

A potato.  A sweet potato.  A great hunk of organic carrot.  Even a squash.  All chopped up, spread out on a foil-lined baking sheet.

The offending pizza boxes, and the dedicated feline
anxiously awaiting their return.

With each stroke of my chef's knife, I could feel myself getting healthier.

And then not so much.

As I was sprinkling some thyme onto my nutrient rich intentions, a strange smell wafted through the air.  Both hot and chemical.  Certainly not natural.

That's when I remembered what was in the oven.

Two Domino's pizza boxes, quickly stashed in the oven and then forgotten about because our two furry four-legged friends have gotten into a terrible habit of breaking into whatever refined carbohydrate/dairy product/animal flesh is within paws' reach.

I no doubt inhaled about a month's worth of atmospheric carcinogens within the ten minute span that those printed, plastic-lined boxes were slowly heating up in the oven before I discovered them and quickly tossed them out onto the frigid balcony.

If I hadn't realized they were in there, I probably would have either choked on the fumes and/or started yet another kitchen fire.

*****

The above tale is the perfect metaphor for my life right now.  I'm really trying to be healthy.  I'm taking a lot of steps towards that goal.  But at the end of the day, I've still got greasy pizza hiding in the oven, a jar of Nutella calling to me from the pantry, and for the love of God, even my cats are junk food junkies.

Sigh.

At least those roasted vegetables were delicious.

(Apparently) To Die For Roasted Fall Vegetables

1. Cut these into about ½-inch chunks:

• A small red potato
• A small sweet potato
• ½ of a large carrot, peeled
• A medium patty-pan squash

2. Spread over a foil-lined baking sheet.  Sprinkle with:

• Salt
• Onion powder
• Garlic powder
• Ground sage
• Dried thyme
• Dried rosemary

3. Drizzle with olive oil.

4. Bake in 450-degree oven for 30-40 minutes, stirring about halfway through.

5. Try not to kill yourself.